We get so caught up in what we think should be like or do. It’s ok to want support.
We think we need to be the tough strong one doing it all alone.
Baloney… Balderdash …Hogwash!
Life is tough and at times we need some support.
As shared in our book “Tough…Tough Times…Tough Decisions” I didn’t ask for help, I thought I had to do it all alone. Family and Friends offered help and I turned every single one of them down. I wanted to prove that I could do it all no that’s not it – I thought I had to do it all. Did it go back to my childhood or was it something I learnt. It didn’t really matter, the only thing that mattered was that it didn’t serve me well.
I gave too much, I did too much and I ran myself into the ground caring for everyone.
Then one day I couldn’t give anymore, I couldn’t do anymore and I stood in the kitchen and cried. I couldn’t leave the house. Luckily I worked in an organisation that had an employee assistance program whom I ran and was able to talk with someone straight away. When I told him everything that had been happening in my life and everything that I had been doing he explained something to me that made total sense and I’d like to share it with you.
We have compartments – when things happen that causes us stress or distress the compartments fill, we empty the compartments by relaxation and doing things that ease stress. In my case all my compartments were filled to the brim and over flowing and I wasn’t emptying them out and then.
We need to keep our compartments at manageable levels. I didn’t. I didn’t ask for help or support and it took it’s toll.
To be honest with you it was the best thing that happened to me – my mini meltdown (as I like to call it) as it taught me how to care for myself and how to empty my compartment.
I learnt that the best care for others was to care for myself and that it is ok to not only accept help but it is absolutely fine to ask for help.
You know yourself the best, you know when all your compartments are filling and you know when it is time to ask for support and help.
Don’t be like me and leave it to the last minute.
